The Whole Person Relationships Model

SELF

The relationship with have with our selves is largely an internal relationship based on our thoughts and feelings towards ourself. This is informed by our beliefs and our values and these inform our behaviours which we have a further relationship to through self-judgment, analysis and reflection. Self-loving behaviours might include self-care, seeking experiences which are beneficial to our health and wellbeing, expressing clear boundaries, being self-confident and acting with integrity. While on the flip side, self-loathing behaviours may include low self-esteem, seeking experiences that are detrimental to our health and wellbeing including addictions, negative self-judgments or comparison to others, having blurry boundaries and self-sabotage.

There is a difference between self-loving activities and self-love. Self-loving activities may include cooking a nice meal for yourself, doing yoga or meditation or having a nurturing hot bath. Self-love is a belief, at your core, internally, a knowing that you are ok. You are confident to be and express who you are, you value yourself, and you are content with taking up space in this world. You believe in yourself, you love yourself. By cultivating this belief you can stop engaging in negative self-narratives and self-sabotaging behaviours. Learning the skills to truely love yourself is on of the greatest resources we can ever invest in.

OTHERS

The relationships we have with others in our lives are significant. We are born into families, develop and grow friendships, work with peers and interact with strangers on a daily basis. Having relationships with others is an integral part of life. So how do you want these relationships to be? Do you want positive experiences, do you want clear communication? Do you want to define your how you relate to people in our life? To be intentional with who you connect with and how you connect with them?

If you are stuck in old habits and limiting beliefs you may find that you get stuck in similar negative relationships with others. Where the same dynamics occur again and again. Learning to love yourself can positively benefit all the relationships in your life. Through learning the skills of self-love you can learn more about what you want and who you want to experience this with.

Seeking positive experiences that are beneficial to your health and wellbeing isn’t only about physical wellness, it is also about seeking healthy fulfilling relationships with those close to you, with your friends, family and peers. And being mindful to have positive and easy engagements with people we don’t know, which contributes to having an easier, less stressful life and you never know when a stranger may just become your best friend or closest companion. Cultivating self-love can help you to become more empathetic and a better communicator in all your relationships.

WORLD

We are all a part of our culture, we hold up its rites. We engage with systems and have civil responsibilities. What relationship do we want to have to these systems? How do we engage with authority how do we interact with the world? If we have a negative internal landscape by default our civic relationships can become quite strained and uneasy. Adversarial thinking, lack of empathy and aggression can lead to some pretty toxic relational behaviours and when expressed in the context of the relationships we have within the world this can lead to some pretty negative experiences for us to endure and in some cases can have dire consequences.

Growling our capacity for self-love not only benefits you internally or with your close familial ties. It has an effect on how you are perceived within the world and the relationship you have towards culture and your civic responsibilities. There are many trials and tribulations in life that we will all face and experience. If we come at these with a fixed mindset and negative world view we may find it very challenging to move through them. Whereas, growing our capacity for self-love, treating ourself with compassion and having an empathetic worldview allows us to be more empathetic within the world. To be inclusive and to move through life with a mindful grace.